The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
