i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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