Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize