It's like God shit irony all over that family
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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