He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Watching her eat just hurts me
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
