: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
