I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
