we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
