So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Holy shit dude........stairs
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize