Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
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