have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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