Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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