how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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