I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
try to milk me bitch
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