it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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