Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
