If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
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