Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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