My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
