Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize