Taylor Swift is so right about you.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
