i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
