Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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