I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
