I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
