I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
