shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize
