I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
