I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
