I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
she looked like the before picture.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
