i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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