I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
It's official drugs can't kill me
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
