i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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