this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
