I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
