PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
