in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
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