Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
