Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
