There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Randomize