i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize