she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
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