I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
