Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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