I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
