Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize