sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
