we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
