u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
