# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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